What once was lost
by CaptainDingbat
Summary: What would happen if the super soldier serum was reversed somehow? This story picks up after it happened a few months down the line. Steve is having to deal with yet another huge life change and it's HARD. Difficulty in accepting Captain America is gone, he attempts to go back to a normal life, but is it that easy? I own nothing of Marvel. Reviews, critique and suggestions welcome!


****A/N – Hey all! A new story for you to run along the others. In this one again, no CW of IW, just your regular Avengers going about their day, but something drastic has happened. This story picks up a few months after Steve Roger was zapped by Hydra, removing the effects of the super soldier serum. His asthma returns, he once again, becomes the little guy who nobody notices…is it temporary? Or will he stay like this for the rest of this life…?**

 **Chapter 1**

Steve pulled the cap down over his head as he leaned against the bridge railing. This wasn't the first time he had been here, and pondered throwing himself over the edge. His feelings of frustration we with him most of the time, only the last week or so they seemed to easing somewhat. Ever since he had started his new job, if he was honest. He was now an illustrator for a comic book company. Pretty ironic really. His alter ego, the man he had become and once again lost, had been immortalised in the comic book series, but Steve had turned his hand to young children's comics, his style of drawing seemed to fit. And it was honest toil, kept his mind away from the fact he was no longer the leader of the Avengers.

Steve had stepped down immediately. He had to, was crazy to think anyone would have taken him seriously and he has suggested Bucky as his replacement, the vote had been unanimous. Once that was sorted, Steve moved out of the compound as fast as his short legs could carry him. Tony's insistence that he stayed on fell on deaf ears. Steve just couldn't stay alongside the Avengers when he could hardly last 50 metres at a gentle jog. Tony HAD however, bought him a decent apartment, stuffed his bank full of money and everyone promised they WOULD stay in touch.

Easier said than done. Steve had stopped calling as often as he did, he found it too difficult to accept he was back to square one. He was a skinny, weedy almost-100-year old short arse. Still, the technology was so much better than when he was young of course, and he discovered gaming, YouTube and blogs. Kept him entertained at night when he missed the company of his friends.

His phone rang. Pulling his cell out of his top pocket to see who it was, it slid his finger across the screen to the 'ignore' sign, couldn't face talking to Bucky today. As much as he was pleased his best friend was doing a great job, he just couldn't deal with listening to what was going on with the Avengers. Maybe in the future, he could, but for now…

A ping told him a message arrived.

 _I swear Steve, if you keep ignoring me, I'm going to ram that cell phone up your nose._

Usually, he would laugh, but not today.

Sticking his hands in his pockets, he headed off to go catch a taxi back to his apartment, he'd stop at the coffee shop too, see if there were a few familiar faces. Steve had made a few new acquaintances since his transformation and living in his new apartment, work too…it was sobering if he was honest.

 **oOo**

'Oh god Steve, I'm SO sorry!' the woman he had just collided with had just covered them both in coffee.

'Don't worry about Katie. My fault, not looking where I was going!'…

Katie, the woman in question, pulled out a tissue and attempted to clean up the mess.

'Thank god it's nearly home time so you won't have to stay like that all day!'…

Katie was one of the illustrators at the comic book publishers where Steve worked. She wasn't tall, like him, and was just…nice. That's how you would describe her, nice. Not that Steve would think anyone would be interested in him, they certainly weren't back in the days pre-serum.

'Don't worry about it Katie, it's warm, it'll soon dry!' he offered a smile then headed off back to his work station.

'Um…Steve?' as he walked, he noticed Katie walking alongside him, stopped when he did. She seemed nervous.

'Seriously, it's not a big deal! Accidents happen!' he said, thinking that was what the matter was.

Katie blushed.

'I, I was wondering if…I mean, I thought about going for pizza after work. If you wanted to come with me I…'…

Katie took the look on Steve's face completely the wrong way. Her face turned pale, she took a step back, her dark eyes wide.

'I'm so sorry Steve, I just thought…but of course, why would you want to…? I mean I'm just plain Katie and…'…she turned to leave, embarrassed to all hell.

'Katie, wait….wait!' Almost gave himself an asthma attack running after her.

'You took my silence the wrong way. I couldn't quite believe someone would ask me to go for pizza. I'd love to'…Steve might be short again, but his heart was still as strong as it ever was…

After her colour had returned in a rush, Katie smiled.

'Really? I've been wanting to ask you for ages! I was so afraid of your response! I mean, you might already be married, or have a girlfriend or…not that I'm expecting anything! I mean I….just a pizza and…'…oh god! She was making a mess of things!

'Pizza is fine. Meet you in reception end of the day?'

 **oOo**

'…so aren't you going to introduce us to your friend Capsicle?'

Steve would have throttled Tony in another life. Now here we was, with Sam and Clint of all people, they towered over both him and Katie, and he didn't like it. Didn't like it one little bit. He felt, well…intimidated with them all here.

'This is Katie. Now you're introduced you can go'…

Tony was about to answer when Sam nudged him.

'We can catch up with Steve later, come on Tony'.

Katie watch them leave in awe.

'Wow, you actually know THE Tony Stark? And weren't the other guys The Falcon and Hawkeye?' she exclaimed excitedly.

'Yes, now can we please talk about something else?' Steve didn't mean to snap, it just came out. Katie blinked and fell silent, and a black mood fell over the meal.

'I'm sorry Katie, they just weren't the people I wanted to see tonight'.

She had just nodded and nothing more was said until they went their separate ways once the meal was over. Katie had paid for the meal before Steve got chance to get his wallet out, then it was a short goodbye, smile and see you at work sometime…

 _Nice one Steve. The first time in your life a girl asks YOU out and you ruin the whole thing…_

 **oOo**

'Geez Steve, this isn't doing you any good at all'.

Bucky was sat opposite him on a chair, courtesy of Tony Stark so the quality like everything else, rivalled that of anything your average home owner could afford.

'What exactly isn't suiting me Bucky?' He stared at his friend, beer in one hand, impatiently tapping his pencil on his drawing pad that was balancing on the couch with another.

'Walking out on the team, on us, your family. Doesn't matter what the hell happened Steve, I told you years ago, I'd always be there for you. Sure, there might have been a glitch here and there, but you're still Steve, and think you made a mistake leaving the compound'.

There was a pause as Steve pondered on the words his friend had just uttered.

'You think it was a mistake, I don't. It was the right thing to do, I'm not an Avenger anymore Bucky, I'm just plain old Steve Rogers, who used to get his ass kicked five times a week'…

'You might not be an Avenger as a job, but you're still in the Avenger's family. I worry about you, being out here. Look, Tony told me he bumped into you when you were on a date?'

Steve snapped his head up…

'Hardly a date. Went with a friend for pizza then Stark and the others turn up and it all goes to pot. Not my finest hour I have to say. Bucky, I have to move on from Captain America, you're in the driving seat now. It's stupid to say otherwise. You have to let me move on too'…

Bucky stood, went to the window and leaned against the frame with his metal arm, taking a swig from his bottle of beer.

'I'm not happy about it Steve, but you're so damn stubborn. Just don't cut us out completely. This has affected us all you know' Bucky turned to face his friend, who was once again sketching on his pad.

'Fine Bucky, I won't'…

'So, tell me about your date?'

Steve looked up…

'Hardly a date and anyway, she won't talk to me again after last night's fiasco. Guess I'll find that out Monday morning'…

 **oOo**

Most nights he didn't sleep well. Kept waking up, flashbacks of the trap the Avengers were lured into. He, Steve….was responsible for all the team and Hydra used that to their full advantage. The resulting trap then, led to Steve being knocked out and subsequently undergoing the procedure that reversed the effect of the super soldier serum. Bruce, the resident doctor had done his best to find an initial halt to the reversal but finally had to inform Steve that it would take some time.

'Look, Steve….I'm going to have to break down your DNA step by step. I have no clue how long it'll take but I promise, I'll be on it every waking moment I have'…

The reaction from the rest of the team had been funny at first, the odd joke and jibe but on realising that this could very well be a permanent thing, the jokes had stopped and discussions on what to do next had followed on.

When Steve finally decided enough was enough and it was time to go, the day had started badly for him after he had tried to do some training and it had almost rendered him unconscious after almost knocking himself out. He had had to get out of the compound to get some air. He drove to his old stomping ground in Brooklyn, though the place had changed drastically, he was so lost in his thoughts he hadn't noticed it was getting late and out of the woodwork, the usual undesirables looking for a few easy bucks decided the former Avengers captain was fair game, and Steve was set upon by three would-be robbers. He remembered all his training, unlike the days of old, so he was able to stand his ground a little longer this time but as his stamina was failing him, he stood resolute, swaying slightly…..fists held up and uttered the immortal line…

'…I can do this all day' just as the cavalry arrived in the form of Spiderman.

Peter had the guys wrapped up in seconds and as he dropped down to Steve, Peter began to speak and Steve turned on him.

'I don't need you to be watching my back...I don't need any of you...'…

Instantly, he knew it was unfair as the poor 15 year old Peter Parker took a couple of steps back, and without saying anything, he jumped up the side of a building and swung himself away.

Sure, Steve had apologised later but the teenager's feelings were bruised. He had thought he was helping the team leader, the captain, and got shot down for it. A blazing row with Tony later over it all found Steve's bags packed and stacked by the front door the following morning.

Comments from the team followed.

'Steve, come on man. This is insane, it's safer here, just until this can be sorted'…

'You're still the Captain Steve. You shouldn't be leaving…'…

'Dammit Steve! You're just giving up?'

By the time the taxi had arrived and was headed for the city, a message via FRIDAY gave him an address, Tony's money obviously talked when it came to getting things sorted…

 **oOo**

Monday morning arrived, cold and raining. Suited his mood as he arrived at work, sketch pad by his side and he glanced towards the booth where Katie had her drawing station set up. First things first.

Working with her earphones on, she didn't notice him at first but then as she looked up to reach for another coloured pen, a mug of coffee was held out to her. Putting on her best 'I'm not bothered' face, Katie removed her headphones and looked up…

'Peace offering and apology?'

After a moment's hesitation, Katie reached forward and took the mug, she smiled…

'Thanks'…

 ****So there it is. Let me know what you think!** ******


End file.
